The Andrew Formerly Known as Prince
I was shocked and appalled, then appalled and shocked, to learn
that Britain’s Prince Andrew (brother of King Charles) was stripped of his
title as Prince and forced to vacate his gargantuan lodge.
But whatever the ramifications of Andrew’s decline and fall,
it got me thinking about his title of prince, and similar words. We ex-colonials in the US
and South Africa neither embrace nor understand these royal titles.
For example, I don’t’ know what a marquis is, or what
he or she does.
[Voice from off-stage: You mean a marquess and it’s
a “he.” The she version is a marchioness.]
Here's the Marquis I was thinking about.
This is a 1971 Mercury Grand Marquis. What does it do? 0-60 in about 12 seconds (yes, I checked)
I digress. What other titles do these royals obsess
over? There’s a baron, for example. Maybe you recall that time when King
John signed the magna carta (1215) under pressure from the barons. (We’re not
told if 1215 was a.m. or p.m.) There was a heavy French influence in England
at that time (day or night) at Runnymede. Maybe that’s why Chrysler followed
the practice of turning to faux nobility titles and named their car with a French
touch, LeBaron.
A 1985 Chrysler LeBaron
The Brits also have a baronet. (Is that a baby baron?).
But while they have dukes and duchesses, they don’t have archdukes.
Dukes, by the way, rank just below king or queen
in the British hierarchy, above the aforementioned marquess and marchioness,
who in turn are above an earl or countess, and a viscount
and viscountess. Then there are the lowly knights and dames at
the bottom of the hierarchy.
But to bring things back home, someone needs to tell Donald
Trump that his son’s name, Barron, is misspelled.
300 words
